and just like that it's all over.

hooray! The holidays are over. Now i guess it's back to real life...or something like that. It seems like everything that could go wrong with 2009 did right there at the end and it's carrying over to 2010. I am trying to be an optimist though...it's my new resolution...maybe it will be the whole "in like a lion, out like a lamb" thing. Does that only apply to the month of April? Or was it March? Eh...I don't really believe in resolutions either so I guess it's just me holding out hope.

I really should have kept up with the crazy work stories...it is endlessly amusing and I feel that they should be recorded somewhere for posterity. However it's been really exhausting lately and I can't seem to keep up with the complete insanity of the public at large. Generally it's a version of the same thing. 40 year old men having hissy fits in public because they want something ridiculous and can't have it. Or grown women turning back into mouthy 16 year olds-hands on hips pouting. I want to have a video camera with me all the time and then I want to play it above customer service all day so people can see how stupid they look. Yesterday a woman told the other girl that I was working with that I was just playing on the computer when I was clearly helping a customer with an issue. My associate pointed out that I was actually working with a customer-the customer that I was actually speaking to at that exact moment-and the lady looked her right in the eye and said "She is not helping anyone!" Apparently she couldn't see the lady that was standing directly in front of me. Who knows.

Lately I've been coming to terms with a lot of things. Life hasn't been so pretty and I'm not sure what I am getting out of the experience this time around. I can say that most of my previous periods of crap have brought me a lot of insight to who I am, who others are and have helped me develop in some not always so obvious way. I don't think that I am really getting anything out of this...other than, to quote my mother "life's a bitch and then you die." Oh and that I am still guilty of giving out more of myself than I can afford and not requiring enough in return. If I haven't learned that lesson already then I don't think it is something that I can change. Must just be one of my character flaws. Really this time around I am just learning to be bitter. Maybe that isn't the intended lesson. Who knows. It's a new decade. The possibilities are endless...and yet as far as I am concerned history just repeats itself.

Song of the day brought to you by Shiny Toy Guns. It's for someone special...you should know who you are. haha!

It Became A Lie On You :
Shocking all the evidence left
On this holiday
When you're creeping up with serious thoughts
And what you're waiting to say

Your words are speaking out of your throat
Like an open grave
Not ever spoke to you in a year
That's what would I say

It became a lie on you
It became a lie on you

If you think that I'm not the same
Then i guess you've changed
Blackened by the temperature made
To spare my name

The grave that you've been digging for me
Became your home
For teaming me as back off of me
I hope you know

It became a lie on you
It became a lie on you




It feels like (feels like) you're letting go
I'm back for days to know (feels like, feels like)
Why you're letting go
Bring on the poison that's in your throat
And fight for days, do know (feels like, feels like)
You're letting go

just sooo tired.

Thanksgiving at my parent's house was grand. We all had a great time and yet it was a little bitter sweet knowing that things are all about to change. It's a long long story but the family dynamic is about to change. Such is life. These days though I go into Thanksgiving with a sense of impending doom anyway knowing that the following day I will be fully immersed in retail hell. Trying to let go of the things that I cannot control so also not going to dwell on that. Now the weekend is over and I feel like I have been run over by a truck. Emotionally I am done. I am just so effing sad all of the sudden. I just don't know what to do with myself. Sometimes I just want to pick up whatever I can stuff in a bag and leave. Go where no one has a clue who I am and just start over. I feel like I need to get away from this expectation that I will just take care of everything for everyone. I want to be the one that gets taken care of for once.

I realize that it is probably my fault that I have become that person. I generally like to take care of people but it has grown to massive proportions. I can't do it anymore. Nearly all of my friends lately have been bitching at me about how all of my other friends use me and they want me to tell them all off so that I have more time to do things for them. Selfish much? sure. It's not even that subtle. "I want you to stop helping so-and-so so much because you never have time to do the things I want." Well what the hell about the things that I want. Has anyone taken even a second to ask? Nope. Is it likely that they will ever ask? Gonna go with probably not. So what's a girl to do? Tell them all to eff off? It is a distinct possibility at this point. Or back to the escapist fantasy where I just disappear.

God! I hate to be so whiny! I just can't seem to come up with any sort of sunshine right now. So how would we enjoy another tale of ridiculousness brought to you by the general public! woot!

I am sure everyone is aware of what Black Friday is and what it is like out there. My store was a wreck! The lines went on forever...all weekend...oh joy. My favorite question of the weekend. "Ummm..." (said of course with a sigh and rolled eyes) "do i have to stand in this line?" I at this point still have no idea what to answer. Do they really expect that I am going to say "You!? of course not! You are so super-duper special that you actually get to cut in front of all of the other people that have been waiting much much longer than you. Please by all means go ahead and step right up so that I can help you!"

One man came in on Sunday and expected us to honor the Black Friday only limited quantity price for an item he had already purchased a week ago. When he was told that it wasn't going to happen he had a hissy. A 40 year old man. Full blown tantrum. How cute! Yes we do have a price-matching policy (who doesn't these days) with some very simple rules that are actually printed in black in white and were also printed in our Black Friday ad. We price match local competitors if they have the item in stock. We do not price match Black Friday prices ever. It's just not really fair to the people who camp out over night to get the good deals if we just go ahead and give them to Joe Blow who didn't want to bother with waiting. Although several people explained this to him as rationally as possible he had a melt down and was using seriously abusive language. The girl that was in charge for the day finally told him he needed to tone down his language as there were children around. He left. As he was leaving he ending up walking behind the girl who told him to watch his mouth and started taunting her "What are you going to do now? Gonna kick me out? Fuck you Fuck you Fuck you!" She turned around and said "I hope that you feel good about yourself harassing a pregnant lady that is just trying to do her job." His reply "I don't think you are pregnant. You're just fat!" She is obviously pregnant. What an ass. I just don't get why people have to be so ignorant and hateful.

There are so many more fun stories and I am sure there are many more to come but I'm out!

Song of the day brought to you by The Postal Service:

Lyrics to Sleeping In :
Last week i had the strangest dream
Where everything was exactly how it seemed
Where there was never any mystery on who shot john f kennedy
It was just a man with something to prove
Slightly bored and severely confused
He steadied his rifle with his target in the center
And became famous on that day in november

Dont wake me i plan on sleeping
Dont wake me i plan on sleeping in
Dont wake me i plan on sleeping
Dont wake me i plan on sleeping in

And then last night i had that strange dream
Where everything was exactly how it seemed
Where concerns about the world getting warmer
The people thought they were just being rewarded
For treating others as they like to be treated
For obeying stop signs and curing diseases
For mailing letters with the address of the sender
Now we can swim any day in november

Dont wake me i plan on sleeping
(now we can swim any day in november)
Dont wake me i plan on sleeping in
Dont wake me i plan on sleeping
Dont wake me i plan on sleeping in

Dont wake me i plan on sleeping in
Dont wake me i plan on sleeping
OOo oOo oOo


sad though....people do think they deserve a reward for just being a decent functioning member of society. ridiculous.

well I guess your daddy told you...

The countdown to "Black Friday" continues. It will be here before we know it. Hooray! Lucky girl that I am this year-I don't have to be in at 4am. This is awesome in every possible way. I do however have to clean up the mess...but at least now I get to enjoy my Thanksgiving. The throngs of people that have been bum-rushing my store already indicate that this is going to be BIG...HUGE...GINORMOUS. Oh what fun. I don't know how this got to be so crazy but I guess it's the thing to do these days. Most of my customers were pleasant today with the exception of a few who were mostly mad because they had to stand in line. I'm not sure what people expect during the Holiday season. Oh well. I did have a particularly funny interaction today with a young guy-had to be 18 at least because he applied and was approved for an in store credit card. He bought a bunch of super expensive stuff but half of it on the card and went on his merry way. Several hours later an older gentleman came into the store to return exactly the same items the boy had purchased which I found a little odd but I didn't think too much about it until I went to process the return for him and asked if there was anything wrong with the products. His answer, "Nope...they aren't even open, my son came in and bought these today and he doesn't need to spend this much money so take them back!" Yikes. So I returned the unopened items for the gentleman who was very polite yet obviously pissed. He then says "and cancel that damn card!" I told him that I couldn't until the refund had gone through so that there was no outstanding balance and then explained how his son could do that. Yikes. Daddy was mad. Just made me wonder what kind of blowout fight happened in that house. I can only imagine what would have happened in mine when I was a kid. Except my parents probably would have let me keep the stuff and then laughed at me when I couldn't make the credit card payments. Not that they are unusually cruel but they would have let me become pretty uncomfortable before they bailed me out. Lesson learned? Mine would have been. Couldn't help but laugh a little...poor kid. At least his dad didn't make him come in and return it with him. Yikes.

...and so for now my world doesn't really exist outside of work. It's sad but it's just the way that it works I guess. January will be here sooner than I think and then it will be back to normal. So now I have the next two days off and I'm going to use it to recharge my batteries, I hope. Then the big day. Woohoo!

And I don't have a song for the day. Nothing seems to fit!

and today's blog is brought to you by Moscato...

just breathe, just breathe, just breathe. it seems to be something that i keep telling myself lately. partially because i have a some crazy upper respiratory infection that is seriously inhibiting my ability to take a breath, and partially because i am an emotional mess all the sudden. my insane imagination keeps taking over and torturing me with all the terrible possibilities my life can take on. yikes.
i keep telling myself that i am a rational human being and i can overcome this craziness. unfortunately the rational side of me is losing quickly to the crazy girl in there.

why so crazy? oh love and the lack thereof of course. probably the most played out reason ever...but maybe the only reason people get nuts (well i guess besides money and power and rage...nevermind...there are lots of reasons i guess). i just can't seem to get a handle on relationships. never have had the knack. starting to worry that i never will. the thing is i hate crazy girls. i hate needy girls. i hate insecure in my relationship girls. i don't want to be that. so i'm not. starting to wonder though if that is the kind of girl you have to be to HAVE a relationship. i worry about being needy so i don't push boys to give me what i want, this usually results in me not getting what i want. maybe this is counterproductive? but what is better? ugh. maybe my expectations are too high. i want what i want and i want you to give it to me without me asking for it. is there something wrong with that? possibly but logic seems to be escaping me right now.

and that's all i've got kids. sad.

song of the day brought to you by Devil Doll (yes, yes, oh yes!)

Bourbon In Your Eyes :
Call me angel and take my hand,
wishing you could be my man
but I can tell if its truth or lies
when you’ve got bourbon in your eyes
tell me something that I don't know
then I dare you to prove it so
I’d ask you to try this on for size,
but you’ve got bourbon in your eyes,

Your so Mmmmm

I find myself showing up at your front door
although I can’t come in i keep coming back for more,
and when you call me baby it feels just like a line,
and everytime you smile when you look into my eyes,
you don't have the guts to love me like you wish you could
I’m gonna find someone to make me feel the way I should.

run your fingers through my hair,
I want you to touch me there,
but I will not open up my thighs
cause you’ve got bourbon in your eyes,
you're the one that makes me smile,
and I know you’d make it worth my while,
but she’s waiting for you and I think she cries,
when you’ve got bourbon in your eyes.

Your so Mmm,

I find myself showing up at your front door
although I can’t come in I keep coming back for more,
and when you call me baby it feels just like a line,
and everytime you smile when you look into my eyes,
you don't have the guts to love me like you wish you could
I’m gonna find someone to make me feel the way I should.

You're so sweet talking
you're so fire walking,
I know I shouldn't but I want some
little boy you’re lost
I see you looking around
but I think that you know more than you let on.

I must leave you cause I know your kind
you’d wake me up just to say goodbye
and I know thats not a tear in your eye
cause boys don't cry and neither do I,
I love your laugh but I’ll never stay
so I guess I’ll be on my way
at least I gave it a try but you had bourbon in your eyes.

and i'm out.

exactly how much do you expect from me?

Oh the holiday season is upon us! I used to dig it. The music, the decorations, the baking, the shopping. My family has always been big into the season. Some of my best memories from childhood are holidays with my family. Now it seems that the holidays have just come down to how much shit you can get for the smallest amount of money. Possibly it's all lost it's magic because I now work in retail...I don't know. I remember two years ago when the Wii was impossible to get and how harassed we all were about it. I don't know how many times I answered a phone call, had to say that we had no Wiis in stock and was screamed at as if I had done it on purpose to ruin said caller's life.."How dare you! I am never shopping with you again, you HAVE to have some in stock and you HAVE to hold one for me and if you don't I am holding you personally responsible for ruining my child's Christmas." Um...sure lady. We actually do have some in stock. I just decided, from speaking on the phone with you for five seconds, that I hate you, your kids are spoiled rotten and will never grow up to be decent members of society so I am going to withhold a Wii from you. Take that!

Yesterday we had an exclusive shopping event, inviting all the "big spenders" from the surrounding area. We had a little meeting right before we brought in the customers, the gist of it being that these are the customers that love our store so it's going to be fun. Take some time to get to know them and let them know about all the great deals we have, they are going to appreciate it. Yeah right! Although I did help one couple at the end of the night that were soooo funny and really nice that the transaction made my heart happy. On the other end of the spectrum there was an older couple that actually threw their goody bag at the girls that were greeting people as they came in and started screaming because the one big ticket item they wanted wasn't in stock and although we had offered to order it for them (with all the perks that the exclusive event had to offer, with the exception that they would have to wait something like three days to get the item) it was not acceptable and we are spawn of Satan. Obviously we deserve to be screamed at and have things thrown at us. I know that it is disappointing to go to a store wanting to buy something and not have it be in stock but these things happen. There isn't a store in the world that can have an unending supply of whatever you may want on hand. So they acted like children and swore to never shop with us again.

Another perk of the event was that is was sponsored by a few of our big brands so all of their stuff was a certain percent off. There was a nice little flier explaining what was on sale and all the details. A lady comes up to the register expecting her product to be 15% off. The product was already on sale for roughly 10% off so she only got an extra 5% off on top of that. The math makes sense when you break it down...the flier explains...and not even in tiny little letters that you can't read (I was actually impressed) that the savings are off of the regular price. I can understand the confusion, I totally get why she wanted to ask about it but when I told her what was going on she was pissed. She didn't throw things like the previous couple but she kept telling me that it was false advertisement and that we were being purposely misleading and that now she understands the game we put things on sale so that we don't have to give them the special price...even though I showed her quite plainly that she was getting 15% off the price...and really that makes no sense. If we were trying to cheat people wouldn't we be marking things UP 15% and then telling them they are getting a deal when we say it's 15% off? I don't know. I guess I could have marked it down another 10% and sold it to her for less than we actually paid to get it in the store...that just seems counterproductive. The thing I don't get is that people get so mad at me personally...don't shoot the messenger kids! There is only so much that I can do.

Third and final scenario...and I promise I will stop talking shop. Like almost every store out there we have a rewards type program where you get coupons and whatnot. To get the savings from said coupons you have to have them with you because we have to scan them to make them work. I realize that people are insanely lazy and have no ability to take responsibility for anything but the amount of trouble this whole situation creates is insane. People get pissed that we can't just take their word that they have indeed earned such and such discount and that we can't just magically make it happen in our system. There is an online way to track your points and print off your coupons and we have a computer that customers are welcome to use to print of coupons if they forget them. The deal is that you have to set up a little account with a password so that you and only you can access your information. There was a gentleman that wanted his coupons so I walked over to the computer and gave him the run down..."I don't have anyway to access your coupons but you are more than welcome to use this computer to print them off. You just have to log on to your account, if you haven't set one up yet then it just takes a few minutes and you will be ready to go. Have you set up an account before?" He assures me that he has so I get him to where he needs to be and step back so he can put in his password. He stands there for like five minutes "This is ridiculous, if I just give you my phone number can you just pull them up?"
"Sorry sir, I have no way other than this to access your coupons."
He types in something that was NOT his password...mumbles something that I couldn't make out, and types something else. This is also NOT his password. "Well here is my card...just go to your computer and pull up my coupons!"
"Sir...this is the only way that we can access your coupons. I am sorry. Are you sure that you have already set up your account because it won't take long to do so if you haven't."
"I set up my account!!!! I JUST CAN'T REMEMBER MY PASSWORD AND YOU ARE BEING RIDICULOUS! I HAVE WAY TOO MANY THINGS TO THINK ABOUT TO REMEMBER MY DAMN PASSWORD. TAKE THIS CARD AND MY PHONE NUMBER AND GET MY DAMNED COUPONS!!!!!"
Really?!? What the hell. This is my fault? It took me a second to respond because I was getting pissed. "Sir this is the only option we have to access your coupons. I cannot pull them up anywhere else. You can request your password but unfortunately it will go to your e-mail address and there is no e-mail access on this computer."
"YOU KNOW WHAT! THIS IS BULLSHIT! YOU ARE RIDICULOUS! I AM LEAVING!"
Oh darn...I don't know what I am going to do without your charming companionship. I am brokenhearted that you are leaving me in peace to go back to my job. Whatever shall I do?

And that is the diatribe for the day. People are crazy. At least it's funny in retrospect. As for my my life outside the retail hell. Strangely parallel. There are just so many people in my life that want an awful lot from me. Or want to own an awful lot of me. I sort of like being independent though, I kind of dig that the only person that I am really responsible is myself. It may be selfish but I know where I am in life and when it is time for me to take on the well-being of someone else I will make that transition. For now I am a single, childless adult and I am going to live like one. I fulfill all of my responsibilities to my family (that is very important to me) and to my job (blech...but I have been raised with a fairly strong work ethic) and I do the best that I can for my friends (because I am a lucky girl who has a lot of those). At a certain point though, there is a time when you just can't give anymore. Unfortunately there are some people who never stop demanding. I don't know why this is...and I don't deal with it particularly well. I already have a hard time saying no. I already tend to take on a lot more than I can generally handle so when people start to take advantage of me I get really angry but don't know how to address it. I am thinking that this is a lesson that I will be learning very soon. I guess we will see how it goes.

Now for the song of the day. One of my favorites!

Mercedes Benz :
Oh Lord, won’t you buy me a Mercedes Benz ?
My friends all drive Porsches, I must make amends.
Worked hard all my lifetime, no help from my friends,
So Lord, won’t you buy me a Mercedes Benz ?

Oh Lord, won’t you buy me a color TV ?
Dialing For Dollars is trying to find me.
I wait for delivery each day until three,
So oh Lord, won’t you buy me a color TV ?

Oh Lord, won’t you buy me a night on the town ?
I’m counting on you, Lord, please don’t let me down.
Prove that you love me and buy the next round,
Oh Lord, won’t you buy me a night on the town ?

Everybody!
Oh Lord, won’t you buy me a Mercedes Benz ?
My friends all drive Porsches, I must make amends,
Worked hard all my lifetime, no help from my friends,
So oh Lord, won’t you buy me a Mercedes Benz ?

That’s it!

Nothing like a little Jop to make your day.

too much?

Ugh...feeling a little fuzzy today, possibly the after effects of the tequila that I consumed last night. Possibly from the cold that I seem to be incubating...or both. Feeling a little introspective though. Lately I have been thinking a lot about the kind of person that I am. A lot of the characteristics that I am proud of though are...overbearing? I am a very open person...very (read painfully) honest and around me people are not strangers for long. I inherited from my mother the ability to talk to just about anyone about pretty much anything. Sometimes I wonder though. Too much? Too loud? Too crazy? Too everything? I don't know. It's not that I plan on changing anytime soon...just giving it some thought. There are a lot of people that seem to like to spend time in and around my life so I must be alright. The thing that bothers me a little is that I deal with every kind of person you can imagine almost everyday and sometimes when they are acting ridiculous it is painfully obvious that they DON'T EVEN REALIZE what they are doing. I would like to be a little more self-aware.

I keep trying to pinpoint the reason that society is so lacking in social graces, manners and common sense and it is really throwing me for a loop. Is it selfishness...is it that we have become so accustomed to instant gratification that we have no patience...is it just an insane sense of entitlement? I can't seem to wrap my head around it...and it seems that it is not going to change anytime soon. Maybe it's just that most people didn't have a mommy that would grab them by the ear and let them know that their behavior IS NOT acceptable. Not really my favorite memories from childhood, but something that I have grown to appreciate as I am not one of those adults that are standing in a crowded public place throwing a full on hissy fit because someone told me no. Which reminds me of this weeks favorite customer...I was helping a very nice lady with a slightly complicated exchange, sent her to grab the item we were exchanging while I took care of some paperwork type stuff. It took her all of five minutes to grab the item and come back so I immediately went to finish up the transaction and the white trash lady behind her pipes in "Why does she get to cut in line? I have been waiting and I was next!" I calmly explained that I was indeed helping the other lady first and that she hadn't really left the line she was grabbing something for her transaction. "Well you are fucking rude! You should have asked me if you could help her first! This is the worse customer service ever!" At which point the nice lady I was first helping steps aside and motions me to help the other lady first...you think that would make her happy, but no. She would not come up to the counter and let me help her so I continued on with the first customer all the while with her in the background "I hate fucking rude people...this is stupid...it was my turn...sooo rude...etc." I was getting ready to tell her to watch her mouth or get out when someone else freed up to help her...she flounces by me in her too tight t-shirt and puff of completely fried bottle blond hair and says "Thanks to you my kids have had to wait in the car for an hour!" Jesus lady! Don't leave your kids in the car! How is that my bad? I just hope that they were old enough to be left alone...I somehow have doubts. Besides she was not in the line for an hour...

So...it's my day off and have at least a few more hours of laying about to help my recovery...tomorrow it's back to the grind. We'll see what the public can bring me...

Song of the day:

Bad Reputation :
I don't give a damn 'bout my reputation
You're living in the past it's a new generation
A girl can do what she wants to do and that's
What I'm gonna do
An' I don't give a damn ' bout my bad reputation

Oh no not me

An' I don't give a damn 'bout my reputation
Never said I wanted to improve my station
An' I'm only doin' good
When I'm havin' fun
An' I don't have to please no one
An' I don't give a damn
'Bout my bad reputation

Oh no, not me
Oh no, not me

I don't give a damn
'Bout my reputation
I've never been afraid of any deviation
An' I don't really care
If ya think I'm strange
I ain't gonna change
An' I'm never gonna care
'Bout my bad reputation

Oh no, not me
Oh no, not me

Pedal boys!

An' I don't give a damn
'Bout my reputation
The world's in trouble
There's no communication
An' everyone can say
What they want to say
It never gets better anyway
So why should I care
'Bout a bad reputation anyway
Oh no, not me
Oh no, not me

I don't give a damn 'bout my bad reputation
You're living in the past
It's a new generation
An' I only feel good
When I got no pain
An' that's how I'm gonna stay
An' I don't give a damn
'Bout my bad reputation

Oh no, not me
Oh no, not
Not me, not me

I'm thinking this one should be my next karaoke venture...

gotta get outta here.

I just don't know what to do with myself. Feel like I am busting apart at the seams. This life just can't seem to contain me anymore and I don't know what to do with the itchy feet. I hate when suddenly I want everything to change....

Work is ridiculous! Yikes. Everyday I am realizing that people are spoiled rotten. Suddenly everyone is three again. Is it really that hard to understand that if you break something then it isn't someone else's responsibility to fix it. Deal with it. People are getting lazier and meaner every day. I don't want to become some miserable bastard that only feels better about life when I am making someone else completely miserable. Unfortunately I think it is a disease that is catching...the worse people treat me the more I want to dish out misery in return. I used to be able to pull out the Mary effing Sunshine act...I just don't have the energy for it anymore. Meh. I'm just getting to old to fake it.

I'm just a fickle broad. Life get's interesting and I want to take a nap. Life get's boring and I am raring to go. I have always had a problem with wanting what I don't have and hating everything that I could get my hands on. Not sure why I work that way. I just enjoy being contrary. It used to be cute. Now it's just old. So...this is life I suppose. One day I will figure it out, and then it will probably be to late to matter. Ha!

For all you rockers out there...song of the day brought to you by Superdrag.

I Can't Wait - Superdrag

I Can't Wait :
we've gotta get outta here
we've gotta get outta here
i'm so tired of this year
take everything that you can
take everything that you can
you wanna hold out you can
it's just the waiting that i can't stand
yeah i know
it's just a year
i know
i know
i hope you let it all down
i hope you let it all down
when no one else is around
don't know what else i can do
don't know what else i can do
i'm so lost without you
it's just the wanting
i'll make it through
yeah i know
it's just a year
i know
but i can't wait
i can't wait
i can't wait
oh no
never wait
i know
i know
yeah i know
it's just a year
i know
but i can't wait
i can't wait
i can't wait
oh no
never wait
i know
i know

that's right...i dig it!